Have you ever asked yourself, “what went wrong?” or “what’s wrong with me?” right after the person you were head over hills with ghosted you out of nowhere? Then you’re in the right place. By the end of this article, you’ll see everything you’ve been doing wrong and the best solutions to make sure that it never happens again. You are worthy of ALL the love you want.
Acting desperate
When you’ve been single for a long time, you may worry that you’ll end up living alone in a house full of cats. Even if it’s natural to feel this way, sometimes, it can become very unhealthy if all you do is obsess about other couples and fantasize about the “perfect” partners out there that you think would never even look at you.
This neediness can be felt by the individuals you want to date a little too much. This is why you have to be honest with yourself and stop trying to make them love you. The only person that can make you happy is you, not the “dreamy” person from Tinder, who hasn’t replied to your texts in three days.
Solutions:
• Stop looking for validation from others.
• Don’t say yes all the time, make them work for you.
• Start working on yourself: Self-care, working out, eating healthy, hang out with friends, go out, focus on your career & hobbies, learn new skills, etc.
Being too available
This goes hand in hand with the first point. When you feel like you want to spend every second of your existence with someone just so you can feel okay… there’s a problem. And not only do you know that, but they do too. So they start wondering why you’re so into them if you barely know them and that’s when they back away.
What you need to do is show them how happy you are by yourself and really mean it. If you start posting selfies all day and do everything in your power to make him see you online, it’s not going to work. You need to disappear from his radar, make them wonder where you are. This is the only way he’ll actually worry about losing you, and the tables will be turned.
Solutions:
• Be mysterious, let them suffer a little while you have fun.
• Don’t text them all day every day. Let them realize you’re not easy, and you can move on quickly if they don’t live up to your standards.
Not loving yourself
Loving yourself is so important and so hard at the same time. We know all our flaws and insecurities, and that can make us feel like maybe there’s someone better than us, and that person we admire so much could never reciprocate our love. Well, feelings are not always rational, and this is one of those times. Instead of worrying about not being good enough, worry about your potential partner not being good enough for YOU.
Do you really want to be with someone who continually makes you feel unlovable and undesirable? Would you want to spend the rest of your life with a grown individual who can’t live up to their word and commit to you? Do you really want a liar in your life? You’re worth so much more, and you can get so much more if you decide not to settle for the wrong person.
Solutions:
• Use daily positive affirmations.
• Have boundaries and standards and NEVER lower them for anyone.
• Remind yourself of everything you bring to the table and never forget it.
If you apply this knowledge in your life every day, you’ll start seeing results and feeling empowered again. But remember, no matter what anybody thinks about you, you are a strong and beautiful individual, and nobody is going to change that. Just as Napoleon Hill said, “You can do it if you believe you can.”
